Friday, November 19, 2010
A little over a year and a half ago I was diagnosed with ALS. Last year at this time I was still able to do many things. I could walk, got dressed by myself, put on my own makeup on, and feed myself along with many other things that were most of us take for granted on a daily basis. Today I sit here and it's a few days before Thanksgiving and I'm thinking to myself wow another goal I'll be achieving. I will still be able to enjoy a Thanksgiving dinner with my family. Throughout this past year to keep myself going I have created little goals. I say little goals but realistically they are huge goals for me. Along with the goals that I have created I have also completed a few my bucket list dreams. I have been able to do many things this year that only few people are able to do living a normal healthy life. I have had the opportunity to travel not many places but have been able to go places where many people only wish to have gone. I also met Donny Osmond and to sit and talk to him for a few minutes on along with his sister Marie. You oneness talk about being humble and down to earth those two are very humble and they don't let being a celebrity get in the way of that. I also had the honors of being able to skydive with some amazing people this year. Being able to share my bucket list dreams with my family and my ALS family has allowed me to stay strong and positive. Let's face it ALS sucks and if anyone tells you that ALS isn't painful think again. This disease for me has been painful in many ways physically, mentally and emotionally. Before I had ALS I was active and healthy and pretty fit. I could even out run my kids but today I depend on others to do things for me not because I want to but because I have to. This is where the emotional pain comes in, I was never one that wanted to depend on others and now I hate it. But what's more painful is watching my husband and kids deal with this. Seeing the frustration and pain in my husband eyes when he comes home to find me in the middle of what I call a boo-hoo moment or if the dinner he cooks doesn't turn out right. My husband is my angel there is nothing that he wouldn't do for me. They say ALS shows no mercy, I have to agree. ALS does not discriminate it not only affects the patient but it affects all of the love ones. This is why I find it very very important to myself to believe. Believing in your dreams, believing in yourself, believing in your God, believing things happen for a reason but most important no matter how hard things get believe that you do matter and people do love you no matter what. So when you're having a boo-hoo moment think about what you've achieved and believe in yourself because if you don't know one else will.